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September 11th, 2009
07:49 pm - Things No One Ever Tells You
Things No One Ever Tells You
Have you ever noticed that there are some things in life no one ever tells you about? There's no cute aphorisms, fables, fairy tales, etc. that directly mention them. You have to figure them out on your own. In the spirit of being helpful to others, I present 3 that I figured out on my own.
Some things are only funny once. Repeating them only makes each succeeding instance less funny. Keep doing it and you will eventually reach a point where it stops being funny and just becomes annoying/maddening.
Stupid costs. Whever you do something stupid, it will cost you in some way. Sometimes the cost is small. If you do something stupid while alone, you may only incur the cost of knowing that you've been stupid and will avoid it in the future. Others bits of stupidity may cost more. Sometimes it's a loss of time or effort. Sometimes a loss of dignity or respect. Possibly a loss of love, opportunity, money, etc. Great stupidity may cost a life or lives. Yours, someone elses, or both.
There are times when there is nothing you can say that will make things better. Learn to recognize these situations and do the smart thing. Shut up.
OK, there's my 3. I hope others find them useful. I also hope other people will add some of their own. I only ask that they be of benefit to a wide range of people. I figured out many other things myself, but they aren't of much use to anyone else. For example: I figured out my late father was a gullible idiot at times, but I don't see that being much use to anyone else. I figured out that there had been 2 world wars on my own, but so what?
OK folks, let's see what you can do. :-D
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August 26th, 2009
06:33 pm - A Bit of Griping
What happened to traditional labor strikes/protests?
Recently, here in my town, instead of picket lines with a fair number of people carrying signs, there's been the following:
A large banner attached to a PCV tubing frame that says, "Shame on (employer name here)"
Behind the banner are usually 2 guys, sitting on lawn chairs, with a cooler of sodas and sandwiches and a beach umbrella or 2 over them. Is this a labor strike or a picnic?
What the hell kind of lazy ass approach to a strike is that?
What happened to getting a bunch people out on the picket line?
Why isn't the 'line' in front of the place being struck against/protested?
What happened to people carrying signs, walking in a circle/oval and chanting about what they're striking about.
If this is their approach to a strike, I can only imagine what kind of half assed approach they're taking to their job.
If you can't be bothered to put some effort into your strike/protest, then don't expect me to support your cause.
OK, getting off the soapbox now. Thanks for listening.
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July 31st, 2009
07:33 pm - Writer's Block: Birthday Shout-out
Goblet of Fire is my favorite. The setting of the tournament and new characters from other schools is what does it for me.
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July 24th, 2009
08:33 pm - My Life According to The Beatles
Using only song names from ONE ARTIST, cleverly answer these questions. You can't use the band I used. Try not to repeat a song title. It's a lot harder than you think! Repost as "my life according to (band name)"
PICK YOUR ARTIST:
The Beatles
ARE YOU MALE OR FEMALE:
This Boy
DESCRIBE YOURSELF:
The Fool on the Hill
HOW DO YOU FEEL:
I Feel Fine
DESCRIBE WHERE YOU CURRENTLY LIVE:
Octopus's Garden
IF YOU COULD GO ANYWHERE, WHERE WOULD YOU GO:
Strawberry Fields Forever
YOUR FAVORITE FORM OF TRANSPORTATION:
Yellow Submarine
YOUR BEST FRIEND IS:
Doctor Robert
YOU AND YOUR BEST FRIENDS ARE:
Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band
WHAT'S THE WEATHER LIKE:
Good Day Sunshine
FAVORITE TIME OF DAY:
Any Time At All
IF YOUR LIFE WAS A TV SHOW, IT WOULD BE CALLED:
Here, There, and Everywhere
WHAT IS LIFE TO YOU:
Crying, Waiting, Hoping
YOUR CURRENT RELATIONSHIP:
A World Without Love
YOUR FEAR:
If I Fell
A FOND MEMORY:
Christmas Time
WHAT IS THE BEST ADVICE YOU HAVE TO GIVE:
Don't Bother Me
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY:
Happiness is a Warm Gun
HOW WOULD YOU LIKE TO DIE?
When I'm Sixty Four
YOUR SOUL'S PRESENT CONDITION:
Flying
MOST FAITHFUL COMPANION:
Lady Madonna
YOUR MOTTO:
Slow Down
Shamelessly swiped from LotM.
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July 19th, 2009
07:09 pm - Since I haven't posted anything in a while...
I've been doing the home repair/maintenance type stuff this weekend. Re-repaired the back porch step. Repaired the front porch step so I shouldn't have the hapless mail carrier falling down because of the loose marble flopping about. Still more marble to reset, but it's in the area that doesn't get walked on much. Put first coat of paint on the front of the house. A few weeks ago I tried washing off what I thought was dirt on the front of the house. Nope, the paint had worn off and I was seeing the metal siding in places. It's gonna take at least 2, maybe 3 coats, but at least I won't have the grungy looking house front anymore. Especially not fun for me since it involves standing on a ladder a fair amount, something I find rather tiring these days.
But I got it done.
Current Mood: accomplished
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May 16th, 2009
May 9th, 2009
08:28 pm - Reminder
It's time for Church (Not). Come on over, we've got condom commercials. Right now.
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April 24th, 2009
07:39 pm - Church (Not)
Your weekly reminder for Church (Not). Miss it and be condemned to eternal mirthlessness. Just a friendly warning.
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April 16th, 2009
08:00 pm - Church (Not)
Alrighty. it's time for that weekly reminder for Church (Not). We had a fun, though abbreviated time last week. Lets do it again for the full length. Come on, what do you say? Hello... Is this thing on?
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April 9th, 2009
08:03 pm - Church (Not)
Hey, hey, hey!
We had a record crowd last week. C'mon let's do it again. The more the merrier. No other church is this much fun. I promise and as I'm the Pope, you know that means something.
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March 26th, 2009
09:46 pm - Church (Not)
It's that time again. Your weekly reminder about Church (Not). You know you want to come. Don't deny yourself. Don't deny us the pleasure of your company. Please, come.
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March 19th, 2009
07:30 am - Church (Not)
OK, it's time again for the weekly whining, begging and pleading. Come to Church (Not).
Please. I swear a great deal of fun is being had by all. We'd like to share. C'mon, you won't regret it.
Bargle, wearing his Pope hat.
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March 14th, 2009
06:18 pm - Church (Not)
Forgot to do one Thursday, but hey, Church (Not) is on for Saturday night. Please come. Bring crunchy snacks and funny vids. Especially funny vids.
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March 6th, 2009
07:59 am - Church (Not)
Ok, we had more folks in last week. Fun was had. Yay! Let's do it again. I've already got some new stuff picked out.
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March 1st, 2009
09:57 am - Church (Not) Related
So people on my friends list won't have a mile long post taking up space.
( Church (Not) Web Pages )
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February 26th, 2009
07:02 pm - Church (Not)
Look people, I only have a limited amount of talent for humor. I can't keep writing some sort of amusing plea for your attendance every week. People need to show up. Please. Pretty please with sugar on top. So my humor well doesn't run dry.
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February 19th, 2009
08:10 pm - I'm not sure why I'm bothering...
But here goes.
Please come to Church (Not). It's lots and lots of fun. Much gay banter. There's even condom commercials. Funny ones. Please come. Makes puppy dog eyes.
Funny condom commercials. It just doesn't get any funnier than that.
So, be there or get pregnant and contract a horrible disease.
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February 5th, 2009
07:53 pm - Pimpin' for the Cause
Since we ended up not doing it last week, I'll use last weeks prompt post. It's still good. No sense making up a new one when the old one still has plenty of life left.
All right people. It's almost time again for Church (Not). I want to see more butts in the pews. We had a couple of new people last week, but we need more.
I seem to have become Pope by circumstance (I've showed up) and I want to have some rumours of scandalous behavior between me and some female members. Hard to do if the only female there is the happily married Sandykidd.
So, to paraphrase an old movie, Church needs women. Especially naughty, single ones.
Oh, men can come too, just bring funny vids. General info follows.
Bring some links to funny vids and share them. Snacks and drinks are your own responsibility, but add to the experience. I mean, blowing soda out your nose, who doesn't enjoy that?
Again, no theme this week, just bring some funny stuff.
You do have to sign up at Meebo.com, but it's free. The chat room is Church (Not) and the password is hahapizza.
See sandykidd's Journal for more.
Rules shamelessly copied from her are:
#1: Always bring your sense of humor to 'church'. It's a Commandment.
#2: Bring a link to a Youtube video with you to 'church' (preferably one under 10 minutes long so everyone might get a turn). Watching stuff together is a 'church' Tradition.
#3: Eat and drink as you like while we chat. That's also Tradition. ;)
#4: You don't have to be religious to come to this 'church', but please abide by Rule #5 below.
#5: You can be irreverent (Tradition!), but don't be a jerk (Commandment!).
Remember, the Pope needs women. (Wink, wink, nudge, nudge)
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January 31st, 2009
08:54 pm - Church (Not)
Last minute change of plans. Church (Not) will be on Sunday after the Super Bowl or at 8:30, whichever is later.
ETA: it's looking like the Superbowl won't finish up until 9:30-10:00. I vote we give it a pass this week.
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January 29th, 2009
07:08 pm - Plugging Again
All right people. It's almost time again for Church (Not). I want to see more butts in the pews. We had a couple of new people last week, but we need more.
I seem to have become Pope by circumstance (I've showed up) and I want to have some rumours of scandalous behavior between me and some female members. Hard to do if the only female there is the happily married Sandykidd.
So, to paraphrase an old movie, Church needs women. Especially naughty, single ones.
Oh, men can come too, just bring funny vids. General info follows.
Bring some links to funny vids and share them. Snacks and drinks are your own responsibility, but add to the experience. I mean, blowing soda out your nose, who doesn't enjoy that?
Again, no theme this week, just bring some funny stuff.
You do have to sign up at Meebo.com, but it's free. The chat room is Church (Not) and the password is hahapizza.
See sandykidd's Journal for more.
Rules shamelessly copied from her are:
#1: Always bring your sense of humor to 'church'. It's a Commandment.
#2: Bring a link to a Youtube video with you to 'church' (preferably one under 10 minutes long so everyone might get a turn). Watching stuff together is a 'church' Tradition.
#3: Eat and drink as you like while we chat. That's also Tradition. ;)
#4: You don't have to be religious to come to this 'church', but please abide by Rule #5 below.
#5: You can be irreverent (Tradition!), but don't be a jerk (Commandment!).
Remember, the Pope needs women. (Wink, wink, nudge, nudge)
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